Pride and Celebration

I've already done an April Bead Journal Project piece (see a few posts down if you missed it), but April is such an eventful month for me that I couldn't put everything into just one piece.  So this is my April BJP piece, part 2.

This piece is called "Pride and Celebration" because I have so much to be thankful for in my life.  This project is my reflections of me.  First, I chose the colors based on inspiration from a peacock.  Bright blues, greens and gold, with a little bit of purple thrown in.  I was drawn to the shape of the swirl, but I don't really know why.  Robin A. had some insight on this when I met with her, so maybe she will share her thoughts. 

I celebrate April 18.  Due to my illness my family and I had been living apart for about 2.5 years.  Last April 18 we moved in together as a family again.  It has been nothing but a joyous home life, and our one year anniversary is important to me.  April 21 is my birthday.  I am officially 39, and I will hereafter be 39!  Because it's my birthday, I've been reflecting on me.  I take pride in who I am, perceived flaws and all, and I celebrate my talents and accomplishments.  I feel that I am a talented beader, I am an awesome mom and wife, a great cook, a good friend among other things.  I have a lot to offer as a unique individual, probably because of my morals and values that I was brought up with.  And April 17 is the date of the first class I will be teaching...it marks my progression as a beader and is something I was wanting to accomplish.  I'm hoping that it goes well and that it is the first of many more to come in the years ahead.

I did have difficulty managing the 15/0's for the entire background.  They always prove to be a challenge to me, and I guess the only way to get better is to practice, practice.  The colors in the photo were kinda washed out.  The background is an aqua blue/green, and the colors in the swirls are very vivid and bright in person.  I'm just not that great of a photographer.  I did try to adjust the colors in Photoshop, but I'm not that proficient with it yet, either.

I am very proud of my peyote stitch around my paua cabachons!  I'm not a peyote stitcher, so this was quite an accomplishment for me.  I was very happy with how nice and neat the peyote came out around the paua.  Oh, and I certainly can't forget to say thank you again to Robin for the gift of the beautiful shell sequins that added some confetti to my party.

So here is "Pride and Celebration", pride in myself and celebration of my April milestones.

By the way, if you live in the Phoenix area and want to take my class, there is one or two spots open.  Email me at indigosbeads@live.com to get more info.  Hope to see you!!!

It's Springtime

Here is my BJP piece for April.  It is definitely a departure from what I normally do.  I had two challenges this month.  One was, of course, April for the BJP and the second was the theme "Spring" for my Artbeads' Blogger Community order.  The very first thing that popped into my head was a meadow--a lush, green meadow with wildflowers in a spring rain.  That's what I tried to create.  I didn't try to get complicated and fancy with it.  I did almost a childlike approach to it.  Very simple and understated.  I have been wondering about my pieces being too complicated, so I wanted to go the other direction with this one.  My pieces are always encrusted without a speck of fabric showing, and I wanted to try to leave a little open this time.  It was VERY difficult for me!!! 

At the bottom I used Kiwi Organza that I swished across the bottom.  I have never used anything other than beads in my projects, so this was something new.  It made me think of big, sweeping watercolor strokes.  In between the ribbon I used a little bit of seed beads to show some lines, but I left some of the fabric showing.  Hard for me!  In the grass there are little clumps of, oh, I don't know, maybe moss covered stones?  I simply fell in love with the 6mm Emerald Isle Mix Glass Pearls!!!  They have the most luscious luster to them!  (I can't wait to use them in another project and my mind is swirling with ideas on how to feature just those beads.)  Here is a shot of them, so you can see them close up...it comes with 3 shades in the mix...just yummy!

I also used several different kinds of flowers.  I used Czech glass lily flowers in turquoise, Czech glass hole star flowers in light blue/amber and pink/white silk,  Czech glass large flat flower in sapphire/white/coral, and a matte amethyst resin buttercup flower.  I think they made a nice mix of wildflowers that I saw in my mind.  I wish the Swarovski butterflies came in a little bigger size.  They did get swallowed up a little bit in my big project, which is a shame because they are very pretty. 

(oh, wow...my enlarged pics really shows my crooked lines!  lol.  oh well.  They looked pretty straight when I was doing them.)

And the last thing I absolutely fell in love with are the 9mm Swarovski teardrops that I used as big raindrops.  They are so sparkly and a beautiful shape.  I saw them and immediately thought of rain!

So, here is my imagined meadow,

Springtime in Heaven

(you can click for a larger view)

Oh, my gosh!  the grass border became a big problem!  I did the grass before I did the sky, and I really shouldn't have done that!  Every pass I made while beading the sky, the thread got wrapped up and tangled in the grass.  Ugh!  I was going to pull my hair out by the end.   Not only did the organza ribbon remind me of watercolors, but I was thinking last night as I was looking at it how the sky made me think of a sky blue Crayola crayon.  :) 

And I cheated a little bit.  My BJP pieces are 5x7.  On this one I put on the ribbon first and put it all the way to the edge of my limits, and added the flowers.  But I couldn't help but think it was missing something.  That's when I added the grass border.  Now this piece actually comes out to 6x8 because of my poor planning.  But the picture part is still 5x7!  So, do I get a slap on the hand for breaking the rules?  lol.  Sorry.  It really needed the border, and I wasn't going to tear it all apart and start over.

This piece really speaks to me in what I think Spring should be.  I don't get these kinds of springs in the desert of Phoenix, Arizona, and I really miss them.  On this one I practiced simplification, a literal interpretation rather than the abstract that I normally do, showing some fabric, and using something other than beads.  Even though the design is a simple one, it was a huge challenge!

Happy Spring to you!

p.s.  after I posted this, Robin Atkins at Beadlust posted some commentary and tips that I struggled with in this piece.  I recommend reading it.  Thanks Robin!

Disclaimer:  Artbeads.com has sent me product free of charge.  I am not being compensated for my honest opinion of their products.

Extremes

Before anything else, I have to apologize for the poor quality of the photography.  I have been trying every possible approach I can think of...direct sunlight, shaded sunlight, indoors no flash, indoors with flash...all to no avail.  My guess is that there are too many mid-tone reds for the camera to differentiate, so the whole thing is coming out very flat and some of the colors are a little off.  Most importantly, my hand-dyed domino that I made looks like a whole lot of nothing.  In reality it is marbled with wonderful shades of red and makes a very interesting focal point...if only you could see it in real life.  : {

So, about this month's BJP.  My therapist suggested I do a piece on my hidden anger.  I have a tendency to hide my negative emotions, which causes me more problems in the long run.  But I don't express it for fear of permanently alienating the person it's about.  So I hold it in.  Makes for some interesting therapy sessions!  I decided to go ahead and do what she suggested, and I chose all shades of red to depict it.  I used everything from ruby red to brown red, shiny to translucent, cubes, faceted roundels, shell, bugles, glass chips, seed beads and sequins.  And every size I could get my hands on...15's, 11's, 10's, 8's, 6's.  My thinking is that anger comes in many degrees, sometimes it lingers and sometimes it passes in a flash. 

But while I was making this, I couldn't help think about passion also.  Red is a very intense, passionate color too.  And all these extreme emotions were swirling around the center, or the "heart" of the piece.  I had intended on making this a monochromatic piece, but I just couldn't help but add the black.  I was not thinking about the black all that much until it hit me like a brick.  With all these intense emotions going on, my subconscious just had to add "the abyss". 

The abyss is part of my battle with bipolar disorder.  It's what I call the deep depressions that I fall into.  The abyss is like a huge, black, empty mass of nothing that swallows me up and I can't get out.  It's as if I get stuck in it like a tar pit, and I claw and grasp onto anything...nothing...trying to get myself out, and it's just sucking the life out of me.  In trying to describe to people what I was going through to try to make them  understand the helplessness of the depression, I came up with "the abyss".   I sometimes tell my husband that I feel as if I'm slipping and I can see the abyss.  It's a terrible feeling, to say the least.

Then added to that is a little bit of silver...the rays of hope for more normal levels of emotions.  Even the bits of hope, though, are shrouded with red...anger and passion.  A little bit of calmness trying to find it's way through this intensity.

And as I was getting close to finishing I realized what I was creating.  My therapist suggested anger, but what came out was something completely bipolar, which I am.  I went 15 years undiagnosed with this terrible illness, and after having my life fall apart and losing my husband and kids for 2.5 years I am now medicated and relatively stable.  My family is back together and I regularly see my therapist and my psychiatrist, and I take my medications religiously.  But always in my subconscious, as shown in this month's project, is the turmoil that lurks beneath the surface, like a wild animal waiting to be uncaged; the abyss waiting to again swallow me up; the passion waiting to become out of control in a fit of mania.  And right now as I am looking at it more, I see the heart completely encased around the sides in protection against all that is swirling around it.  Maybe I can know that all this is there, it is all within me, but it does not define me and it cannot take my heart with it.

Again, I apologize for the poor quality of the photo.  But, if you want, you can click on it to get a larger view.  I know what I was thinking when I created it, but I am always interested to hear what you see.  Is it different than me?

Extremes
(5"x7")

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog.  Oh, btw, if you are on Facebook, click on the link on the right sidebar and look me up!  Would love to have more fellow BJP'ers on my list of friends to keep in contact with!

February Piece Finished

Here is my February piece finally finished.  (If you would like to read how this piece started, go can back a couple posts to get up-to-date.)  I had many challenges, and maybe some personal revelations, while creating this one.  As you can see, these are not traditional Valentine's Day colors (much to my little Sara's chagrin).  I was inspired by the colors in the pendant, and after all, I am a little less than traditional in a lot of ways.  I make my own way about things and don't necessarily beat to the same drum.  Well, I did put in some hearts for the traditional Valentine's Day (although in amethyst and copper), but I wanted something a little different to express what my love for my husband and children was like.  I was happy to find a wonderful assortment of elements at Artbeads to embellish with, and I decided to go with flowers.  They start out as little seedlings, they need water and nourishment and attention and then they slowly grow more beautiful each day.  Maybe the large heart pendant is like a sun looking down on the whole thing, shining love over it all.  Or maybe that's a little too corny.  I don't know.  These things all crossed my mind as I was stitching away.

I had 10 amethyst hearts but for some reason I only wanted to use 6 in my design.  Then it dawned on me...as I was making my little fans that look to me like pretty flowering bushes, there are 6 of us in my family, so there is one to represent each of us.  I almost didn't use the antique copper hearts, but at one moment in time they begged to be put on, so I did, but only two.  They are solid, weighted beads...they are not cheap, flimsy little things (I highly recommend them).  And I thought it was like me and Jeff...we are solid in our relationship and very grounded now.  There was a time when we weren't (which is a whole completely different long story), but now we are at a very good, solid place.  And that's what these copper hearts made me think of.

And then there were a series of pathways, each leading in a different direction, but isn't that really how it goes?  And the different little patches surrounding the vines and flowers reminded me of a birds eye view of the landscape.  So, to me this piece represents my family, our love, our paths, our growth, our roots, both at eye level and from up high to look down on the whole picture.  I'm afraid this sounds so silly and sappy, but I'm being honest with all the thoughts that went through my head as I made it.  Sometimes when I look at it, it's all cohesive, and other times I look at it and it seems complicated.  But I guess that's just how life is.

Your comments and feedback are always welcome and appreciated.

Love Blossoms

You can click for a larger view, too.   Happy Valentine's Day everyone!